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Author Archives: Shay
Alienated from shadows, butterflies, and waving ferns
This feels strange. I’m still not used to living with so many windows. My nervous system is not yet familiar enough with the world outside them to be fully comfortable. For instance, I frequently turn expecting a threat at … Continue reading
The half-brother I’ll never meet
Today is my half-brother’s birthday. When I was a teenager my mother told me to commit to memory her first child’s birth date, hospital name, city, and state. I recited them to myself again and again and throughout my life, … Continue reading
Posted in Interpersonal Neurobiology, Mental Health, Nervous System
Tagged Boundaries, brother, family, Family Constellations, home, Kindness, Love, mental health, personal growth, Resilience, Trauma
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No shame in survival responses!
No shame in survival responses! Every living organism is naturally and normally oriented toward safety, integration/wholeness, and well-being. From an Interpersonal Neurobiology (IPNB) lens, the “something preventing that from happening” is never the organism, but impediments created by the environment. … Continue reading
The courage it takes to speak up against sexualized violence
I often hear that I am courageous for speaking my truth about sexualized violence in my life and its prevalence in America. Yeah, I know. But what is this courage really about? I’m not courageous because I speak my truth. … Continue reading
Permanently discharged from the mega-hospital and thankful!
One year ago today ChristianaCare (CCHS), the mega-hospital that dominates Upper Delaware, sent me a letter to inform me that it was “terminating our relationship” and that I was being “discharged from all ChristianaCare outpatient practices.” The letter claims that … Continue reading
Posted in Patient Safety, Safe Medicine
Tagged #ChristianaCare, CCHS, discharged, legal department, Medical PTSD, Mega-Hospital
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Close Encounters with Hospital Para-Police
The state of Delaware allows public and private institutions to employ constables or para-police to help “preserve the peace and good order of the state,” including on ChristianaCare (CCHS) facilities. Though they are not allowed to carry guns on duty, … Continue reading
Posted in Patient Safety
Tagged #ChristianaCare, Bad Medicine, Constable, Delaware, hospital, Para-Police, Police Abuse
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The importance of decisive action
Sometimes I’m frustrated that my body needs every freaking thing in little bits! Evidently I’ve overused my hands and wrists messing with clay. And I’m driven to make one more niche. But my body says stop. So I need to … Continue reading
Psychology’s pathologizing terms, evidence of a shame-based paradigm
Psychology’s pathologizing terms hint at the underlying toxic paradigm, which says the therapist is the Great Healer and the client/patient is the Broken Thing That Needs Fixing. Some of the worst pathologizing and shaming terms: “Disorder” presumes there’s something wrong … Continue reading