Author Archives: Shay

The myth of self-regulation

Healing from trauma requires co-regulation with regulated nervous systems, particularly for those who experienced Developmental Trauma, which most often occurs in relationships. We are MADE to co-regulate. Wired for it. Co-regulation is a biological imperative. That means we cannot survive … Continue reading

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America’s “standard treatment” for childhood trauma: more abuse and neglect

If you had “good enough” parents you were blessed with a fairly regulated nervous system, integrated brain, and secure attachment style. These contribute greatly to a sense of well-being from which health arises and a good life can unfold. If  … Continue reading

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How Do Predatory Physicians Get Away With Their Crimes for Years or Decades?

Without my knowledge or consent, a surgeon cut an approximately 2″ x 2″ piece of healthy tissue from my genitals while I was unconscious. This surprise disfigurement of my body caused deep and lasting harm. No unintentional deviation from a … Continue reading

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“Like Larry Nassar running with scissors”

After almost three years of recovery efforts following a brutal violation, I’m able to speak up and take action regarding the urogynecologist who sexually assaulted me with sharp instruments when he intentionally performed non-consensual surgery to remove healthy tissue from … Continue reading

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The capacity to make good decisions

The capacity to make good decisions is among many aspects of self that are dependent on sufficient nervous system regulation. Beyond a certain point of dysregulation, we lose our ability to feel love, joy, peace, gratitude, and beauty inside us. … Continue reading

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My “Patient Story” is up at Patients Rising

“I am motivated by the unconscionable harm I received when I asked for help with Developmental Trauma. I saw the same thing had happened to most of the people in that ward: early trauma in a chronically toxic childhood environment … Continue reading

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“Anger is a Secondary Emotion”

“Anger is a secondary emotion,” a watercolor I painted 3 years ago, about 3 weeks after my ordeal in the ER and mental hospital. Anger is often an indicator of a violation. This one was enormous. Although I painted well … Continue reading

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Open Letter to A. Snortz, Psy.D.*

I write this on the third anniversary of our final office visit. You probably forgot that day. I have not. To refresh: my GAD was back up to critical, I told you I had increasing suicidal ideations and thought it … Continue reading

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Follow me on Facebook for more info on stress/trauma/PTSD/CPTSD

When you follow my TraumaAwareAmerica page on Facebook you can receive and find great info, tips, tidbits, insights, art, news, humor, and more about stress/PTSD/Complex PTSD and recovery, neurobiology, and mental health in general. Be sure to join the TraumaAwareAmerica … Continue reading

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Turn Around Your Stressful Triggers with the Alexander Technique

My friend and Alexander Technique instructor, Imogen Ragone, and I share an idea from her BodyIntelligence work and the Alexander Technique has helped me “turn around” one of my most stressful triggers – hyperacusis and synesthesia stemming from trauma. We … Continue reading

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