Tag Archives: Developmental Trauma

The courage it takes to speak up against sexualized violence

I often hear that I am courageous for speaking my truth about sexualized violence in my life and its prevalence in America. Yeah, I know. But what is this courage really about? I’m not courageous because I speak my truth. … Continue reading

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The importance of decisive action

Sometimes I’m frustrated that my body needs every freaking thing in little bits! Evidently I’ve overused my hands and wrists messing with clay. And I’m driven to make one more niche. But my body says stop. So I need to … Continue reading

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People don’t “attract” abusers relationally or karmically

Some have tried to convince me that my experiences of cruelty and contempt have to do with karma, “laws of attraction,” or some other subconscious or spiritual desire or need on my part for a Kozmick Lessin of some kind. … Continue reading

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Humans as social animals

Human beings are inherently social animals, but, unfortunately, the ability to properly function as a social organism takes a certain set of resources, of which many of us were robbed or never allowed. Proper human functioning is nearly impossible for … Continue reading

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Cuckoo’s Nest, Day 1

“What am I doing here? I hate it so far. Noisy, institutional. No real comforts, shitty pillow, cold room, can’t see through the window. I don’t even have personal care items, like soap, shampoo, deodorant, toothbrush, and toothpaste. So here … Continue reading

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Enter the Cuckoo’s Nest

Me, four years ago tonight, at the cusp of what would turn out to be a horrible turn of events: “I’m having serious problems with my SSRI medication and I need to talk to a doctor. Increasing suicidal ideations, wish … Continue reading

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The Cuckoo’s Nest lives

Four years ago this month I was in a cuckoo’s nest! I’ve been working on trauma recovery for over 20 years. Unfortunately, some of the worst damage to my nervous system occurred through the so-called “standard treatment” for PTSD when … Continue reading

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Can’t we just run away from our trauma?

Can’t we just ignore or run away from our trauma? I tried! I quit my whole other life. Fledged my young adult children, sold and gave away my stuff, fixed up the house, sold it out a major loss, and … Continue reading

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Don’t “flip your lid,” down-regulate!

How does regulating the nervous system help sufferers of trauma and chronic stress? What is the “window of tolerance” and how can we widen ours? What happens in our brains when we “flip our lid” and how can we avoid … Continue reading

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The myth of self-regulation

Healing from trauma requires co-regulation with regulated nervous systems, particularly for those who experienced Developmental Trauma, which most often occurs in relationships. We are MADE to co-regulate. Wired for it. Co-regulation is a biological imperative. That means we cannot survive … Continue reading

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